Familiar times

Its been a while, a long while, but here we are. Quinn recovering from heart surgery, Steph sleeping, with Wes, and me with a laptop, pulling the nightshift at Quinns bedside. Right now he is sedated while we wait for swelling and bleeding to subside. Periodically, he wakes up and freaks out a little, and tries to cry with a breathing tube down his throat. This increases his blood pressure and he bleeds more. So for tonight, morphine and more morphine. When the bleeding and swelling come under control, he will be expected to wake up and panic about his predicament, while maintaining vital signs enough for the staff to remove him from the breathing machine. Waking up is going to be a pretty unpleasant experience for him.

Even though the setting is familiar, 4 yrs with this kid has changed everything. For one, he looks much bigger on these same hospital beds. But also, Steph and I don't look at him and wonder about what kind of kid he'll be or what good times will be like with him. The little boy he's become, I can't say enough about. More than I could have fathomed as a brand new father. Now we see a little man who we laugh with every day, and know how enriched he's made our day to day lives. A little man who is so much more aware of his surroundings, making his bravery all the more impressive. This whole process I must say, he has handled dutifully.

Steph is in another part of the hospital with little Wes, where she will try to get all the rest she can while keeping him fed. Wes is a good eater and sleeps a lot. A calm baby for the most part. Really helpful for Quinns hospital stay. But I give Steph a ton of credit for keeping her fear and anxiety about this surgery in check while nursing a newborn. I really really lucked out that she is a tough woman.