Thursday, November 30, 2006

One enchanted evening - I added two photos

Dan is so astute. I do try to get him to post as much as possible. Believe it or not I think I enjoy his posts as much as everyone else does. He just puts so much of himself into them I love reading them. But, I guess it's time for the mama to talk. I feel like I've been able to spend so much more time with Quinn lately. While we were in Providence they pretty much kept him sedated because of his surgeries and he had a lot of tubes and wires in him, so all I could really do was look at him and stroke his head. Also, they had rounds and change of shift at which time (understandably) we had to leave the ward. But this happened every couple of hours for at least an hour. Here Quinn has been much more awake, we don't ever have to leave the room, and as you've seen he has much less equipment sticking out of him so, as Dan mentioned in his post, I was finally able to hold my son!!!!!!


(I have more pictures, the camera died before I could get them on the computer, I will put them on later)

I had such a wonderful even with my son yesterday. It was pure bliss. I sat there holding him stuck in one of life's most perfect moments for hours fighting back tears (unsuccessfully might I add) thinking that this is the way life should be for all babies. Babies should be held by people who love them as much as possible, especially when they are in pain.
I feel like I've been waiting so long to hold him. In the same instant though, I look down at him and can't believe he's here, a little mix of Dan and I. It floors me what an enormous thing this is and what a little miracle he is.
It's funny, one of the nurses today moved a chair for me today even though I told her I could do it. She looked at me and said, you just had a baby remember, you should still take it easy. To which I replied, hmm, I guess I did just have a baby, but I swear that has to have been like a month ago. He was actually a pretty good delivery (I think, I have no comparison). No, contractions are not fun, but all in all it wasn't bad. My sister convinced me to call my doctor at 4:30p on Tuesday the 21st. I had been having contractions since 1 am the morning before, in fact Dan and I had gone into the hospital on Monday but were sent home due to lack of progress. So when I was still contracting on Tuesday and hadn't had much sleep since Sunday night I just wanted a little break to be able to sleep. I knew though if I called the doctor that they would tell me to go to the hospital. Since I didn't feel like anything had changed since Monday I didn't want to go to the hospital because I was sure that they would just send me home again. It turned out to be a good thing Sarah told me to call the Doctor because I had actually progressed to the point where they admitted me to the hospital. I called Dan to tell him to come home from work and Sarah stayed with me at the hospital until he got there. I was doing really well drug free until the doctor decided I wasn't progressing well enough and that they should give me Pitocin. After 1hr 20min of pitocin induced contraction on top of contraction, drugs couldn't come soon enough. Dan would tell you I was hitting him at this point, although I don't remember that, if he says I did I'm sure I did. I had really wanted a drug free labor, but anyone who has had pitocin the way I did will tell you how difficult that would be. Once the doctor put in the block (pain killer) life was great. I could feel contractions but only just enough to know when I was having one. When it came time to push, I didn't feel any pain at all, what a beautiful thing. Quinn came an hour after I started pushing without any tearing or the necessity of an episiotomy (yeah, thank you soo much Dan). So this is the point in the story where we find out there are complications and you all know what happened from there. I just didn't want Quinn's birth to be swept away in all that has happened since. It was a happy and eagerly anticipated moment. One that I'm glad Dan and I had without knowing what lay ahead. I think had we known there was going to be complications ahead of time, things would have been very different.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Stephie and Dan,
I am so glad you finally got a chance to hold and comfort your little guy!
Before you know it he'll be home with you guys in his Patriots onesy and watching the playoffs with his Daddy and Uncles.
Quinn is definately a fitting name. Dan your posts are so eloquent and heartfelt, you definately have a talent for writing that I never knew. Now I know, how you managed to woo Steph across the Atlantic and from under the sea!!!!!
Love and Prayers,
Steph and Dave

Robin said...

Hi Dan & Steph!

Oh Steph, I'm so glad you can finally hold him!!!

I have to tell you something that will make you cry, but it's too good not to share! A woman from our church wrote a Christmas song for Quinn! I will try to post the words here!

Robin said...

CHILD IN THE MANGER

(verse 1)
Child in the manger
King for eternity,
Sweet little baby boy.
Hope of the human race,
friend of the children,
your mother Mary's joy.

(chorus)
Come now, Baby Jesus,
hurry and come down to us today.
Show us all the love of God
displayed in the face of a
new born child.

Robin said...

(verse 2)
Born in the city,
laid with the animals,
a prince wrapped up in hay.
Profits and seers old
from far adored you,
others turned you away.

(chorus)

Robin said...

(verse 3)
One lamb forever,
born to redeem us,
come to a Bethlehem stall.
Grown up to teach us
to heal and feed us,
died to give life to all.

(chorus)

We will try to record this for you!

Anonymous said...

Steph,

Hooray! I am so happy to see you holding your little man. And to see him without all the lines, tubes, etc. just brings tears to my eyes. He is a precious little bundle. You just glow holding him. I think I speak for everyone when I say thanks for keeping everyone informed. I check your blog about a million times a day waiting for new Quinn pics and updates.

Much Love!
Toby

Steph Dull-Holcombe said...

Dear STeph & Dan,
I heard about your new baby boy (CONGRATS!!!!)from Toby's blog on her myspace and I've been checking daily to hear how your precious boy is doing. :) He is beautiful and all yours!!! From one parent(yes, I have 3!!) to another u guys are doing GREAT!! Quinn knows and can feel your love you have for him and that is helping him cope with all of this. He knows he has wonderful parents!!
I just wanted to say hello; and yes under the strangest circumstances but.....my heart goes out to you guys. Congratulations Mommy & Daddy.
God Bless, Steph (Dull) Holcombe

Anonymous said...

Steph and Dan,
I just wanted to let you know that i am keeping you all in my thoughts and Prayers. Toby let me know about little Quinn. He is adorable!
Love,
Danielle Gomes(Stickler)

Jess said...

Steph, you look so content and happy in that photo. What a peanut! He's so beautiful, and I'll be he's much more content now that he's in his momma's arms. I'm glad to hear your voice in this as well. Dan is an incredible writer and I love to read his posts, but it makes me happy to hear from yo as well. I love you both!
Love, jess

Pop said...

Step,
So glad to see you back on here. I think you made a great point...the miracle of the birth not getting swept away and missed by all the other tuff things that have happened. I can tell you that I certainly did not lose site of the miracle of the birth and how much (9 months) of carrying you did and the wonder of giving birth. You were and are incredible!!! The hours I spent with you after the birth amazed me because of the inner strength you showed. I love the pics of you holding Quinn. Just the way it should be.
Love you all sooooooo much.
Pop

Lily's Mommy said...

I've never see anything more beautiful! What a contented little boy with his amazing momma!! So glad to see it.
Love,
Kelly

PS. Do you have a Boston address? Or can we send something to the hospital?

Tracey said...

Steph!! I'm so glad to hear your input into the blog (though as others have said, Dan does a great job). And SOOOO happy that you got to hold your little guy. It is funny how big he looks in pictures by himself, then when your or Dan are in them, he is a little peanut!! I think he has a wise face, perhaps enhanced by the "chinaman" effect, as Dan calls it!! I do hope that sharing your experience makes you feel more supported and loved by people--even reading others comments to you makes me feel warm and fuzzy. I'll continue to check a million times a day cuz sometimes there are little gems like a new picture!! :-) xo
Tracey

Aunt Nik said...

I can't tell you how happy I am to see Quinn without all those tubes! Isn't it just the most wonderful feeling looking at and holding your newborn? I used to feel that I would give my life for this tiny bundle when I had my kids! At your age Dan, I bet your mom still feels the same way when she first laid eyes on you. It doesn't go away, it just gets stronger! Anyway, Steph, I'm glad to see pictures of you..I hope someday soon I can get to finally meet you! This time it would be even better with Quinn, also. And..CONGRATULATIONS to you two. I can already tell that you will be great parents! Thanks for keeping us who can't be there posted on Quinn's latest.

Love you, Nik